Thursday 6 May 2010

Lego – P-13 Vulture

My nephew went to the Warplane Heritage Museum. I was a bit envious since I couldn’t go, but it got us talking about planes, and I pulled out some books I had on WW2 planes to show him. This of course inspired me to make some kind of prop driven fighter plane out of Lego.
Wing Commander Sir Percival Heathcliffe-Anstruther-Willoughby, III, GC, MC, DFC, DSO, AFC, MBE, 14th Earl of Hempfordton, Percy to his Eton pals. 
He’s taken command of a secret squadron of experimental P-13 Vultures, the latest design from Labrador Electric Gunnery & Ordnance.
“There I was in China with Chenault’s Flying Tigers. We were vastly outnumbered by the Japs, but with my keen skills, I was able to down 17 Zeroes in one day, but not before....”
“There I was in Spain, sent secretly by His Royal Highness to give those fascists a good licking. We saw a squadron of Heinkels about to give Bilboa a pasting so we dove out of the sun and....”
“There I was over Dunkirk, when I saw some Stukas start to dive towards our defenseless boys down there on the beaches. I turned hard left and climbed to meet those filthy huns...”
“There I was, the height of the Battle of Britain, attacking 8 squadrons of Junkers that were blasting Coventry, when 15 squadrons of Messerschmits showed up. By jove, how very unsporting I thought, but nevertheless I wheeled about and flew straight for them, all guns blazing....”
“There I was over Libya when we spotted a column of Mussolini’s lads. “Chip-chip tally ho!” I shouted over the radio and in we dove for a strafing run...”
“Where are those blasted mechanics? I’ll just have to repair this engine myself. There I was in Burma and a lucky shot from a Jap machine gun hit my engine, and I had to repair it with some wire and a tin...”
“There I was over the Barents Sea protecting the convoys, when right below me a ruddy U-Boat surfaced. I moved into position to make a torpedo run when Fritz got his deck mounted flak guns into action. Suddenly tracers were arcing past me.....”
“There I was in Singapore on leave, enjoying some gin and tonics, when we received word that Tojo’s chaps were invading. I raced to the aerodrome, and got my Hurricane up just as a group of bombers was approaching from the north...”
“There I was over the Mediterranean at night, the ack ack had played havoc with my instruments and I needed to land on the deck of that aircraft carrier. Well just as my fuel was about to run out, I see some twinkling lights. Right-oh that must be it....”
“There I was over Sicily. I saw some Jerry panzers down below moving towards the Royal Shropwickenhamilfordshire Fusiliers. I only had two rockets left, but with some careful aiming, I managed to turn 7 of them into flaming wrecks....”
“There I was over France on a recce sortie when my wing man shouted that he had a Focke-Wulf on his tail. I tell you it was none other than Baron von Scheissenhoff....”
“There I was, piloting a Mosquito on a pathfinder mission, when suddenly the sky was pierced by blinding search lights and flak began bursting all around us. Ever so deftly I flew right in between it all....”
“There I was over London returning to base after having already shot down 7 buzz bombs over the Channel. One of my chaps who was out of ammo, told me he could see one headed straight for Buckingham Palace....”
“There I was over Holland happily shooting up Hun trains with my Typhoon, when suddenly I see one of those new ME 262’s on my tail. Can’t be having any of that old chap, so I quickly pulled into my trademark Percy roll and....”
“There I was protecting the Flying Fortresses as they bombed the ball bearing factory at Schweinfurt. Suddenly one of Adolf’s new rocket planes goes streaking past. Well, naturally I push the throttle forward on my Mustang and set off in hot pursuit....”
“There I was, Midlands, mid 1940, and the situation was just dreadful. We didn’t even have time for tea and crumpets as Goering’s chaps were relentless in pressing forth their attacks. But we got our kites up for the 9th time that day and gave those Nazi bastards a sound thrashing...”

2 comments:

  1. Totally Cool! My 8 year old son Rudi says he sees parts from the LEGO Seperatist Shuttle, and Anakin's Jedi Starfighter! I love the story, and Percy's 'Triple Barrelled' last name!

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    1. I’m sure your son is correct. I just used my nephews collection of parts, and wouldn’t you know it, he too has quite the collection of Star Wars kits. What is it with kids and Star Wars? Oh wait, I’m not a kid anymore and I’m just as obsessed with it as they are.

      I was trying to create a completely cartoony stereotype of a totally over the top, poncy upper crust RAF officer. One who somehow managed to serve in every theatre of operations, win virtually every medal there was to win, somehow survive every engagement and come out on top. I guess you can make that happen in Legoworld.

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